Changes/Weekend Recap

This past week was SO RAINY. Hurricane Alex was en route to Mexico so we had to deal with some major tropical storm damage. Pouring rain, flooded streets, heat and humidity. Just a quick reminder of this week's setting.

So, on Thursday Philip came over around dinner time. (Haven't been seeing as much of each other since he started his job sooooo far away and lives at his brother's house soooooo far away.) Over the phone we planned on having Japanese food but Chris & Shara called and invited us to eat at Huynh's downtown which he said was BYOW. We're there. I was walking to the corner store to get two bottles when Philip pulled up to my house, so I made him walk with me. He was all disgruntled at the way I was holding the umbrella 'cause he was getting wet. I think people who are not holding the umbrella should have to keep up with the one holding it in order to make it work.

Huynh's was pretty good. Philip had the pho which I liked because it was heavy on the star anise (licorice flavor is what I like to call it). I had a charbroiled chicken rice plate which I thought tasted better at Pho Saigon. Two bottles of wine = not enough wine for 4 people. Shara didn't have to work the next day so we ended up going to her and Chris's house to have some bloody mary's. We woulda had some Sweet Tea, but it was a dummy bottle. Someone drank all of it and then refilled the bottle with soy sauce and water instead. So clever. Except my nose works so you can't fool me. Go ahead, insert big-nose-joke here. We played sing-star and I could only beat people when I harmonized with Philip and then we went to Glitter to continue the karaoking for a little bit.

On Friday Rex had a party at his house. He lives way out on the other side of the world too, so Philip just went there straight from his brother's house. I caught a ride with Chris and Shara and we decided to take 45 to the beltway which was THE WORST IDEA EVER. We were stuck in traffic for a straight hour because the feeder was completely flooded and cars were driving through the grass to come up onto the freeway. The whole time we were starving and we kept debating whether or not to exit and get some food. Texted Philip about what food was there and he said they ordered pizza which made my mouth water. When we got there I totally thought it was a pineapple pizza but it was grilled chicken. I'm pretty sure everyone got fooled by that too because statistically more people get pineapple pizza than chicken pizza, and that's a fact jack. Also, 48% of all statistics are made up. We played a lot of beer pong in Rex's garage with a million mosquitoes and million couches. His roommate is like the most useful roommate ever. He made a fan station to flow the A/C from inside the house to the garage and hooked up some speakers for music. But we didn't need either of those things to win the first 4 rounds of beer pong. Win! Win! Win! Philip thought he was such a funny guy that night. It was probably one of his career highs. My ride left me there at the end of the night so I had to beg Philip to give me a place to stay. Psych. More like the other way around.

Saturday. Philip, Bryan and Russell went to work out and left me and Marianne to do whatever we wanted. She took me around the northside and we went to The Container Store where Martha Stewart's biggest fans all work. That place makes you want to buy everything and makes you want to change your life. But man, every time you stopped to look at something a lady would walk up and have a story to tell you about why that thing is so awesome. It worked and I'm a sucker. I got talked into buying a thing that soaks up moisture in a room and collects it in a basin. What's embarrassing is that I talked it up like it was the best thing ever to Philip, hours after buying it. I'm pretty sure I'm returning everything that I bought from there. After that Marianne's like, "Wanna go to DSW to look at shoes?" Yesyesyesyesyeys. So many goodies so little money. Marianne was trying on these black heels and this old Mexican lady sitting near us was looking, so I gave her the thumbs up, like "yeahhh, she should buy them." Then she starts talking to us all fast and in Spanish and I know we have that wide-eyed, looking around nervously but laughing because we don't know what the hell she's saying look. But she just keeps on going. We kind of pretend to know and just talk back to her anyway. Maybe she doesn't have many people who want to talk to her. We get some Starbucks and go back to her house. Oh yeah, and I bought a pair of pink wedges on sale. We sit around and watch an hour of America's Funniest Videos "10 Best Pranks Edition" and it was so worth it. Favorites were: the plastic carpet runners with pointy side flipped up to unsuspecting guests, the one where one friend put an iguana on the other friend who is deathly scared of iguanas and the fake lotto ticket montage (so mean, but so funny). We went to Banana Republic so Philip could get work clothes since my brother works there and gets a discount (kinda, not really). When we walked into Banana, I waved into the security cameras because my friend Marcia's boyfriend Isaiah works in the Loss Control Department. Of course it worked, so he came down and we talked for a little bit. No one was stealing anything that day so he was super bored and was probably so extremely happy that he ran into two of the most interesting people in the world. We ate Taco Bell at the mall and it was unsatisfactory because they forgot the guacamole that we ordered. Did anything interesting happen at The Galleria? Probably not, I can't remember. After that Philip took me home and he went to Nikko's house to eat and I got ready to go to Mo and Abbas's going away party at Boheme's. They are moving to Seattle where it's just as rainy as it is today I guess. The party was fun and I loved the atmosphere. Bet it's the bomb in the spring-time because their patios are really nice. Left early so I could meet up Philip at my place to go to Pearl Bar where Mile's was celebrating his birthday. So many people came out that night! I invited my neighbor Adam to come with us and he did. I think he had a good time. Kept trying to buy shots for everyone which was cool. Oh yeah, and at the end of the night me and Philip got into a bad fight says everyone else. Supposedly he said he was going to kill me and I said "Ok, I'm dead." I don't know if that's true, but that's what Nikko said. I still remember having fun at the end of the night at my place though. Alter egos are cool.

Sunday was Philip's cousin's engagement party. Ate a bunch of food, played with a bunch of kids, realized how delicious jalapenos were, played the hand-slap game, got owned and sweated a lot. Walked to the park and pushed kids on swings for what felt like forever and then tried to get on the monkey bars. Philip made fun of my armpits so I scared him when there was a wasp nearby. He ran away. I win. After the engagement party we drove out to Katy to party at Nikko's house. I stopped by Jolene and Matt's (and baby Joseph's) new house since they live like one neighborhood away. So weird that my old partner in crime is now settled down with a fiance (fye-ance says Holly Hunter in Raising Arizona), a kid, two dogs and a house in the suburbs. We popped some fireworks and drank a beer just for festivities sake. While Philip and I were standing the driveway Joseph bragged to us that his dad was so strong that he could smush him back into a baby. That's pretty strong. We convinced Matt, Jo and Joseph to come back with us to Nikko's to drink and party. We popped way more fireworks and firecrackers (those things get addicting) and played beer pong and flip cup. Joseph made Philip play Pokemon cards with him because Philip is king of Japanese loser boy games: Digimon, Pokemom, Yugigoh, Bloons TD4.
After that we all went to Baker Street in Katy and the waitress was a total B. (Dumb waitress was being rude cause she's a loser, probably a bad day, but that just means she sucks at her job. Her and jessica got into it because jessica asked for a pitcher and the girl got rude. Then jessica purposely said out loud while she was standing behind her that she shouldn't be sucky to us because other people sucked to her. Also, she got joseph's order wrong twice, and he was the only one to order anything, and rolled her eyes. Joseph's thing is what started it. Anyway, I go to close my tab cause it's about to be uh... Girlfight. I mediate a little, and while I'm talking to her she's rubbing my back like I'm friends with her cause I'm the one with the tab. Loser. I slap her in the face a couple of times and she pays for the tab. Perce! Went back to nikko's and I ate the whole bag of hot cheetoh's that I was mad at them for having cause I knew I was gonna kill it later, and the rest came back with whataburger.)

Monday. Philip and I ran some errands at the bank and grocery store and then went to his Tito Boy's house. He's not really a boy, he's a grown man. We ate a bunch of leftovers from the engagement party and then I got really, really sleepy. Philip laughed at his little cousin Kate after she tried to sit on a stool and almost fell out. She got mad and ran up to him with a fist (a fist grasping a pen) pretending to stab him and then she got in trouble so she balled up and hid her face in a pillow for what seemed like forever. Diego wanted me to race paper airplanes with him so I did. I never learned any airplane folding techniques as a child, so I just make them up and make them symmetrical. Usually mine just plummet and don't do anything cool. I challenged Philip and he made one and we raced them and and mine fluttered and plummeted while his glided for a SECOND (been doing this my whole life). Took Chris back to his house and then we went to Kroger again to buy groceries to make healthy dinners for the week. Kroger's twice in one day. We had rotisserie chicken and spinach with a side of The Book of Eli. I thought that movie sucked "ball hairs". (Thought the movie was fine, aka fioooooooonnnee)



Jess/(Philip)

Weekend Recap

***Longest Weekend Recap in the Universe***

Key: Philip responds in blue. Jessica responds to Philip's post in red.

So the weekend kind of started on Thursday for me because it was the senior's graphic show. They're all graduating so they display all their work to try to get professionals to see it and maybe hire them. The show was at Winter Street Gallery. It's a good gallery, but the seniors last year did it there too, so next year we'll have to find a new gallery otherwise everyone would get tired of going to the same place 3 times in a row. Philip made me sad before we left for the show, but then it went away real quick. Just wanted to remember that. It's like movies, you want to feel stuff, so maybe this will trigger something one day. Drew and Miles came over, bought beer, played darts, ate chicken nuggets, went to the show. They had free beer and appetizers so it made things better for the boys, I'm sure. We went to the after party at 13 Celsius which is a wine bar downtown. It's a cool spot- I always drive by and want to go in, but I never do. It was fun because there were so many different groups of people there. My professors, my graphics buddies, Gerry, Philip and his friend Sam, my friends Miles, Chris and Kevin. Beer + Wine = weird hangover. (Kinda weak cause I knew I had work in the morning, so I was kinda boring.)

Friday started early too. I had to go to court to turn in my defensive driving stuff so I left work early to do so. Man, I go to that courthouse so much for driving stuff. By the way, they totally re-vamped the whole place. 32" LCD screens around the whole lobby, new glass windows, new flooring, etc. I wonder if our new lesbian mayor did that. Gay people have taste. I like the changes though, because the system is way more orderly than before. Got to the courthouse, parked my car and couldn't find my ID. Called Philip. It was in his wallet. Drove to his work to pick it up and then went back to court. (I knew she would forget about my google master title. She got to my work and needed to know where to get stuff notarized. Googled it. Your bank will do it for free, and UPS costs money.) There are always soooo many Mexican people who are in trouble! Seriously. They even have the Mexican ice cream cart guy outside of the court to cater to them on a daily basis.

Philip had a half day because that weekend would be Mother's Day. Weirdest reason for half-days ever. BUT he does work with all these ladies, so he reaps that benefit I guess. He bought roses for each lady there because I guess they're all moms. I can imagine him going up to each of them and handing out a rose. So cute/gay/nice. He gave me the leftover roses which he left in his car, which wilted from the heat. Still thought it was sweet. I'll take what I can get. (I guess I'll let the bag out of the cat. Tita Meng wrote down on a sticky note, "Buy 6 long stem roses for tomorrow." She walked up to me and said, "Mr. Philip, I have some extra curricular activity for you." She just showed it to me without saying anything, so no one would know, but even I didn't know. In my head, I was just like man what do I have to get roses for, but then I figured it was for all the ladies. Still, I was like why do I have to get roses cause I suck.)

I ended up with a half day too, since it took me forever to get all the court stuff done. Went to Oishii and ate. I did it big by ordering stuff NOT on the HH menu, (which I hate - Philip). I'm rich 'cause of my fat tax return. I keep saying that and acting on it, going to be so poor so soon. Tried to take a nap after that, but instead gave Philip a Chinese lesson on how to say: 1. What? 2. Still a long time 3. I remember my first beer. He picks up on things I'm saying on the phone to my mom and he makes me repeat them and teach him. So far he can say the above mentioned and "That thing, so scary." and "Yes." (I'm pretty sure we did nap for at least an hour, oh yeah we did cause I was saying now I'm gonna remember how to say these things cause you learn when you sleep.)

Went to the Tavern for Pattie's boyfriend Thi's surprise birthday thing. Met some old friends up there. Viraj, this Indian guy who talks black, likes to rap and plays ping pong. (Viraj is the guy who got Thi to go to the Tavern by saying that he got a flat tire near by and needed a jack. I asked Thi if he was mad cause Viraj called him to help him out, and he was just like I was trying to use the excuse that my jack might not fit your car cause I have a BMW, and we made fun of him for that.) Viet, who used to date my friend Tracy and has a circle tattoo of a sun around his belly button.

(So, that whole group was going to House of Blues, which had a special room where we didn't have to dress up. Jessica, what was it called? (The Foundation Room.) Anyway, we went back to Jessica's so she could change, and I find out Sam's at Union with some other people. We stop by there cause it's really close to Jessica's, but we end up staying there the rest of the night, and we see so many other people each of us know small world like. They're all not there together too, which was weird cause it was pretty empty there too. Casey, Stephanie, Geoff, Sam, Ian, Irene's cousin.) (And also Huy, who drunk-chatted up Philip about some spartan tv show.)

Oh man. I gotta go downtown for work stuff. Philip, please finish this. Thanks.

Jess

Added some stuff, but leaving work now. Maybe I'll finish when I get to your place.

Philip

Ok, I, Philip, am doing Saturday:

Woke up too early like at 8 something. Stayed in bed until 12 something cause Jessica had an appointment with her personal trainer for her one free session. Finally went back to sleep for about 45 minutes, and she gets back and tells me it was sucky cause she didn't get any pointers on getting a good butt. Actually it's cause he just put her in a corner and made her do some medicine ball and body weight stuff. That gym is gay cause both guys that work there and helped her keep hitting on her. (Don't know what's happening. I'm friendly with them like I'm friendly with homeless people or people who work at Kroger.) She just got a text from the trainer guy about getting coffee (Not true. He said " be glad to lift with you, it's on me!" No coffee was involved.), and that other guy asked her if I was just her friend and said he'd give me a one week free pass if she wanted, and he said he'd show her how to use the machines. That's what they call it now. I had a plan for Saturday to get my oil changed, eat at Tornado, and then get something for my mom for Mother's Day. Only did none of those cause we didn't get out of bed till 2, and then I couldn't find the thing I wanted to get at the store for my mom, so I just ordered it from the internet. It's some dumb aromatherapy body patch to help with itch relief cause my mom has had allergies for like two months straight. Went to church at 5 with my parents. Met up Chris and Nikko at Chris' house while Jessica was eating with her parents. Tito Monching was there hiding to surprise Tita Tess for Mother's Day cause he wasn't supposed to get back into town for another week. We all went to dinner at Beaver's, a barbecue place, with Bryan and Marianne. Pretty good and expensive, but rich Tito Monching paid for everyone. Tough guy.

We all go back to Chris' and play Monopoly. I win. We decide to go to Pearl Bar for someone's birthday. Me and Jessica go back to Jessica's to change, and I invite Sam and Monalisa. Sam says ok, then I guess he found out last minute it was his dad's birthday and said he couldn't come. What a good son. Mona says ok, and she said she'd be there before 11:30 cause that's when we're trying to leave. Me and Jessica play darts until 12, and Mona hasn't even left cause of all these excuses. She's gassy, can't find anything to wear, and is arguing with her boyfriend. We meet everyone at The Lot right next door to Pearl, and they're playing the video photo hunt thingy. Peace, Bad Robot. Hello, Good Robot. He had the high score, now we do. Mona meets us, and then my brother and Marianne leave cause they hate her. Actually it's just cause they're tired and married. We randomly see people we know separately but are together small world like again. I see people from my basketball league who's game the next day is at 2PM, and they're having all the fun. Nikko drank too fast, again. He has his head down on the back rest of another chair towards the end. We split up and get Jessica's car from the valet. We get it, and the truck in front of us backs up into Jessica's car. Not bad, couldn't tell cause I was kinda drunk. I just told the valet guys to remember us next time cause that was super sucky. Jessica drives Mona's car, and I drive Jessica's to Jessica's house. ( I liked this part, cause Mona asked Philip if she should trust my driving and he said, "Yeah, she's the best." - or something to that degree. He will deny this and say he doesn't remember.) Us three hang out while she tries to sober up to drive home. It's like 4, and I have my game at 10AM. (By hanging out, he means he turned on the TV, which I HATE for "after-parties". I'd rather talk about my ideals.)

Sunday:

I wake up at 9 to get ready for my game. Jessica usually comes to every game, but this time she sucks and can't get up. I get a text from Jason that sounds all scared, "Where are y'all at?!" I don't text back cause I'm 10 minutes away, plus you think I got unlimited texts or something? Like a minute before the games starts we only have four when a fifth shows up. I'm thinking, awesome, I'm gonna be playing 40 minutes son. We end up winning by 17, and I made 7 baskets with an and 1. Jessica missed it. I always tell her that if she doesn't come then she might miss something awesome, which she did. (Maybe Philip should just do awesome stuff more often and I would never miss it, because i'm there like 99% of the time.) It was an and 1 dunk, then I dunked the free throw. Guess working out during the week works cause I didn't get that tired either from playing all 40 minutes. What was good about losing our first 5 games was that you don't have to keep the stats and run the clock for the next game. I volunteered to do it this time cause Jessica wasn't waiting. I only got yelled at once by this lady watching for not starting the clock on time. One team was up by 10 the whole time, and the other court was a close game. I was like man good thing this isn't a close game where I have to pay attention to the clock and the number of fouls and junk. Boom with 3 minutes left, the team that was down scored 7 points in 30 seconds. Anyway, left, without payin' and didn't say a word to anyone!



Went home so I could go with my parents to Three Olives where the family brunch was happening. Jessica went to her family barbecue at her parents' house. Three Olives is an Italian place in Katy that's not that good. Saw everyone, and Tito Monching surprised Tita Tess there. At brunch I heard that Nikko threw up on the way to the sink at Chris' house. I also heard that Chris' dad may have stepped in it in the morning. Brunch ended, and everyone went to the hospital to visit Tita Claire cause she might have had a very mild stroke. Can't fit 40 people in a hospital room. She probably coulda nursed herself at home. Went home and took a nap. Jessica picked me up, and we went to Swirl across from Baker St. There was this Caucasian/Italian/Jewish/just loser American lady there... (So Philip and I totally overheard this lady [overheard is an understatement 'cause she was saying it to her husband across the store,] talking about the taro flavored yogurt. She was like, "Ugh! Did you see this flavor? Taro? What IS IT? I tried it and it is SO disgusting. Why would anyone in their right mind choose that? YUCK!" Philip whispers to me, "I'm a little offended." So was I. It was like those feelings you get when you were younger and anything that to do with race got you a little bent out of shape.)

philip: do you want to talk about taro?

jessicamtsao: yes

hard

philip: ok

say that even i felt a little offended

jessicamtsao: yeah duh

both

felt it

cause we're asian. and they're talking about our freaking roots

pun

Went to Baker St. to play pool and darts, but it was freezing like always in that corner. Went to Slick's cause in Midtown the Slick's there has unlimited pool for 5 bucks on Sundays and Wednesdays. This one only had it on Wednesdays. We played for an hour, which was like 5 games, and it was 13 dollars. I hate that place. Then we got sad cause we thought we were getting boring cause we couldn't think of anything else to do cause I couldn't come over and watch movies. We went to Randall's to get groceries for the rest of the week and be healthy. The Randall's card just makes the prices go down to other cheaper stores' prices. (I used to go to that Randall's a lot when I was younger. Nostalgic. The meat department lady talked to us for a little bit about Asian moms versus Mexican moms 'cause it was mother's day. I like talking to strangers. I think Philip does too. But he has a hard time talking to people he already knows. Like the stop-and-chat with acquaintances type thing.)

I went home and put the groceries up. Took in all the plastic bags at one time looped all heavy on my forearms- because everyone knows you'd rather make one heavy trip versus 3 trips. Updated my graphics blog.

Look Up: Muscles

Are you still building muscle if you're not sore?
http://www.shapefit.com/muscle-soreness-results.html
http://www.intense-workout.com/muscle_soreness.html
Both say pretty much the same thing. Using soreness as a sign for your workout being a good one or not is wrong. When your body adapts to the movements of the exercises, you'll start getting less sore, but that doesn't mean they'll be less effective.


Jessica started her membership at this fancy schmancy place in midtown cause it was a cheap special, and I went with her. She wants to make her butt bigger, so I looked up some stuff.
How to work your butt using squats.
http://www.nowloss.com/How-to-do-squats-for-a-bigger-butt.htm
The site looks dumb, but it says most of the stuff that I've read from sites I trust.

7 things you must do to get a bigger butt doing squats

1. Place the bar on your upper middle back and hold it with a wide grip...
2. Place your feet wider than shoulder width...
3. Point your toes out at a 45 degree angle...
4. Keep your head up & Look straight ahead...
5. Squat down as deep as you can is most important - the deeper the better...
6. Push back up thru your heels to activate your butt muscles and...
7. Bonus tip: Pause for 2-to-5 seconds at the bottom to better activate your butt muscles

Parking Lot Rules

There are a couple of parking tactics for finding a spot when the school lot is too full. First, you can park your car in a specific lane and hope that someone from that lane leaves, then you just turn on your blinker and ease your way in. Easy. Only rule to that one is you can't get in a lane if someone is already there. Second tactic is that you wait by the entrance of the art building and wait for people to walk out. You drive up to them with your window down and solicit them into riding in your car as you drive them to their spot. This one is a time-saver, but I'm always uneasy about doing it 'cause it's kind of creepy. The small-talk is another reason it's not as appealing. There usually isn't much to talk about and it's usually about my seat-belt beeping 'cause none of them put it on when they get in. "Man, isn't that beeping annoying?!? It's ok though, you don't need to put it on, 'cause I'm sure your car is super close." Really interesting conversations.

So one time last semester, I was driving around looking for a spot. Nothing was happening. No one walking out, every freaking lane taken. I was really getting upset 'cause I hate driving around in circles making eye contact with the losers who are staked out in the lanes over and over and over again. I finally see this guy standing among the parked cars, looking all confused and stuff. He probably even scratched his head. Really awkward looking, young, skinny white guy. Big backpack. You know the kind. I pull up next to him and I'm like, "Hey! Can I give you a ride to your car?" He doesn't even turn around to acknowledge me, so I keep at it. "Hi. Helllllo? Let me give you a ride!" Nothing. So I honked a little honk. He finally turns around and I'm like waving at him to look at me. He walks over and I ask him again if he needs a ride. He starts talking and says he can't remember where he parked and also that he's deaf. I'm like, WHOA. He talks so gooood. Super impressed. He gets in the car and I start driving around. He puts on his seat belt. I ask him what kind of car he has ( a Jeep), what color is it (green), if he remembers parking far or close (doesn't know). We make small talk as I circle the lot and he tells me he's studying technology, IT stuff. I tell him he's really good at talking, and he tells me he's also really good at lip-reading. So my face is always slightly turned towards him as I'm driving. I bet I looked dumb and I bet he gets that look a lot. Anyway, we keep circling and I'm like, dude, where the hell is his car??? I see other spots opening up, and this is taking way too long. He sees me eyeballing all these available parking spaces, and he tells me to just take one and he'll walk around to find his car. Sweet. I pull into one and I'm all like concerned, "Are you sure???", "I mean it's cool to keep looking.", "I feel bad." He insists, so...yay. He gets out of the car and we start walking away. I turn around all smiling big, and I go: "DUDE!!! Use your car alarm button!" (I am accentuating my mouth for each word and I'm doing whole the pressing an imaginary car alarm button thing with my hands). He says back, "I'm deaf!"

I'm smart. Wish I had the annoying seat-belt beeping conversation with him too. Then I'd be double smart.

POOOOOO

The previous posts of my mom's e-mails were from last year when she was visiting Taiwan. After she came back she decided she wanted to improve her English, so she enrolled in an intensive English program at Rice University. I'm really proud of her 'cause she did really well, and her English has definitely improved since then. Darn. It's getting rare to catch those good mistakes. Thankfully, she still has her days.

--------------------
Dear Family,
Thank you Jeff, I received your worm message from face book, I will take care my self safely.

I call daddy every day, he was moping the floor when I call him tonight, because Cooper pppp and POOOOO on the floor, hehehehe...
--------------------

So... my brother sent her a worm message, now she has a virus.
Also, when I first read that Cooper had PPPP and POOOOO-ed, I thought she was saying he farted (PPPPPft) and poo-ed. But really she was just saying that he pee pee pee peed. Lots of small pees and one big poooooooo. Because of these events, my dad was very sad and moping at the floor.



jess

Annoying

If you had to use negative words to describe yourself, what would it be?

I would say there are many times that I feel obnoxious, annoying and crude. I have foot-in-mouth syndrome quite often too. I apologize in advance.

So yeah, yeah, it's April Fool's Day. I looooove April Fool's Day. It just feels like a fun day even though nothing special really ever happens. I'm the opposite of Philip. I would love to get tricked today, or any other day, really. I like practical jokes and magic tricks. I guess I just like the element of surprise even if the joke is on me.

Like, the other day at Kroger, we were checking out in the self check-out counter and I tried to scan the rotisserie chicken i bought, but it wasn't working. The plastic felt all greasy, so I just kept re-scanning it until the worker came to help me. He scanned it too, and it didn't work for him either, so he said, "Oh, actually I think these are free today." His acting was good and it just seemed like a genuine statement. I didn't even miss a beat with my excited, "Really?!?!" Philip told him that he got me good. Super fun. Play more jokes on me.

So there are some times when I think of playing jokes on people too. They're usually really dumb, but it amuses me, so whatever. Yesterday in preparation for April Fool's Day, I changed my voice mail to the "Hello? Oh hey, what's up? Wait, I can't hear you. Speak up. Helllloooooo? Helllllloooo?" thing and I know it's old and everyone's done it before, but it always works. And I know the feeling you get after you get duped for something dumb like that, so that's why I did it.

I texted my friends to call me cause I had big news to tell them.

Here are my friend's responses.
"Wow. Really?"
"You are so gay."
"Lol. I actually said Hello. Idiot."
"Ha ha. very funny jokester."
"That is stupid."
"OMG. Ur so gayyyyy."
"Gay!"
"Ha. Funny."
"damnit."
"damn you. damn youuuuuu."
"you r so gay."
"DUDE. YOU'RE GAY"
"You're stupid."



jess

Logos

There was one night I was messing around with making a banner for this blog, and I made one which I put up the next day. Philip didn't take much of a liking to it- he was a little embarrassed. I took it down, which was good, 'cause I really didn't like it that much anymore either. So anyway, Philip said "Why don't you just make a simple logo?"

Why can't YOU just make a simple logo?

So one day while he was at work, he doodled some and told me about it. I got really excited and thought that was so funny that he did that. Yesterday before we walked into steak night at the Hideaway, he took out a paper from his pocket and said, "lucky you" or something like that. Best.



I like the three olives. I mean two olives, cause one is crossed out.

It's not funny, but it makes me laugh. I also laugh at the handwriting here. Cough Syrup is a good one.

jess

I Love My Mom

I love my mom. She is pretty cool and I know I get a lot of my personality from her. One thing we don't have in common though, is English. My English is awesome. Hers...not so much. To her credit, I'll have to say her Chinese is top-notch. She writes poems and teaches Chinese calligraphy, so you know, no time to learn English. I can't read much Chinese, so when we e-mail each other she's forced to do it my way.

-----------------------------
Dear YoYo,
I play with Jo Jo's two kids every day, too bad I don't have camera, the big one are so highper, the small one soooo cot.

talk to you later

Mom
-----------------------------
highper=hyper . This one is good 'cause she tried. It was close!
cot = cute. Don't know what she's sounding out in her head for this one.

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Dear YoYo
since daddy and mommy all out of town, I really presur your help. Without you, we probable can not make this trip, I want to said "THANK YOU YO YO", I'm so glad I'm your mom.

Thank you taking care of my office work, I WILL LET YOU make three wishes, what do you want? Star on the sky? black Ross? OR a House?

Yes, me and dad will have a good vacation, since you are handle everything in office, even daddy's work, WOOOOOOOW !

Love you and miss you
Mom

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presur = appreciate. When she says this in Engrish it sounds like "preeshur". Kinda close to appreciate, don't you think?

black Ross. Oh man, this one was my favorite. When I first read it, I was so confused. Especially because she capitalized Ross. What she meant to say was ROSE. A black rose because black roses are rare and she is my mom and knows me so well that if I had three wishes, one wish would be a rare black rose. I would also like a star ON the sky. Or maybe she will just get me a house. WOOOOOOOOOW.


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Deal all:

Thanks for you all always thinking about me, I'm so lucky have you all be my family, love and happy is a healthy food, eat then one times a day, TODAY I'M SO FULL, I ATE A LOT, THANK YOU ALLLLLLL, E-mail is a best gift.

LOVE
MOM
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She is a sweet, sweet woman, isn't she? Now, why is it that she can write "Dear YoYo" but cannot write "Dear All"? Maybe she really means Deal all.

I have noticed that my mom loves to make these weird metaphors. It makes sense though. Come on, take her advice: Happiness is the healthiest food of all. Make sure you eat it at least once a day.



jess

drawing circles

When I first started art school it felt ridiculous. I was really unsure of myself, especially since most of the kids in the program knew they wanted to pursue art, whereas I kind of just fell into the program by accident. I initially started out in the Interior Design program, which was eventually bought out by the Architecture Department, which subsequently meant you had to reapply to the School of Architecture (no matter how many years you were in the program), which I did, and failed to get in. I remember when I got the news, I went to my car and cried.

They gave me options though. I could be a painter, a sculptor, a photographer or a graphic designer. I guess it all turned out to be a blessing in disguise. No complaints, except that I wish I finished this a long time ago.

In art school, you have to get over a certain level of embarrassment in front of your classmates. You have to learn to B.S. your way into the minds of your professors and learn to use cliche art-phrases to explain WHY you did you what you did, which you eventually start believing yourself. It was really hard for me at first, but then you just get used to it.

Here are some highlights of when I felt the most ridiculous:
Painting different sized black circles for a whole semester, then putting them on the wall and discussing why I placed them in certain areas. Those discussions usually lasted 3 hours.
Doing an exercise where the professor played different types of music, asked us to close our eyes and sway while scribbling on a pad. I was extremely uncomfortable during this one because I knew people were peeking. Then we had to put them on a wall and discuss them.
There was one time the teacher asked us to make different textures using things that wouldn't be considered, such as soap, olive oil, gasoline, sand, etc... I kept thinking about how lame it all was, and I didn't get what the hell we were supposed to do that for. In the end, it kind of became a competition on who uses the most outlandish materials. I always felt like it was the walk of shame as you walked up to the wall and tacked up your stuff. Not only is everyone judging you and your work, but you have to openly discuss it too. Thankfully, my classes aren't like that anymore. We still have to talk about our work, but it has gotten easier now that we've been conditioned to do so.

One of my classes this semester is about modern culture and documentation of this era. The projects are kind of gimmicky, but I like the ideas behind it. Our current project requires building a journal based on different events, thoughts and discoveries. I have always wanted to do something like that, but never really had the motivation to do so. I like saving a lot of crap that I think have sentimental value, so it would be reasonable to just stick it in a journal. Basically, the project calls for us to do things that we normally wouldn't consider doing in our "busy" lives and then find things that relate to that event and compose it into a handmade journal. Maybe a ticket stub, a wrapper from some candy you ate that night, writing down a phrase that someone said that day...I like this stuff, but I think Philip has a different take on it.

Something I did this weekend that that I have never done before was attend GoodPhil. I like watching Philip play sports. Watching all these people be all athletic made me wish I could be all Sporty Spice-y sometimes and that I had nice thighs and a nice butt. I think I'm going to put that in my journal somehow.

Jess

Stuff I like

I like having things in common with people that I don't know that well and acknowledging that we both like it. It makes for a good 30 second conversation and a fake-bond. When I first started hanging out with Philip, we kept saying how much we don't have in common-but at the same time, we kind of have a lot in common too. I guess the things that we don't have in common are superficial.


Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

Easily one of my favorite movies. I first saw this when it came out in the theaters and I was completely blown away. I remember getting scared at how realistically they portrayed the ups and downs of relationships. Pessimistic, but also so romantic without using the usual romance formula. I also remember wearing a black long sleeved shirt to the theater and when I came out there were white marks all along the bottom of the sleeves from snot- from crying, not allergies. I ain't no nerd! I was so embarrassed.




The Brothers Bloom




Rented this and watched it one Sunday afternoon. Didn't anticipate liking it, but it turned out to be really entertaining. I laughed out loud and felt nice and satisfied when it was over. That's one of my things about movies-I need to feel satisfied. The story-line is interesting and the acting was good too. I love Rachel Weiss. Her character is the bomb.


Vicky Cristina Barcelona


















My favorite Woody Allen film of all time. These two best friends go to Barcelona and happen to meet this artist (Javier Bardem), a cocky douche-bag who is twice their age. He hooks up with one of the friends, and then the story begins. Sounds cheesy, but it's solid.


Bright Eyes-First Day of My Life

If you have a gag reflex towards sappy music, this ain't for you. I have loved this song for a long time and even though Conor Oberst's voice is warbley and slightly off-tune, I have grown to like him a lot. The whole I'm Wide Awake it's Morning album is good. Sweet lyrics.




Yesterday was St. Patrick's Day. Went to Lucky's for a little bit and then went back home. Philip was not drinking and had to go home so he did that, and I ended up re-meeting up with Chris at Tipsy Clover. Had a good time. Later went to West Gray Cafe and had to make friends with a goth girl because she heard Chris say something about her lips (they were really big and collagened up). I could tell she was mad for real. She kept calling him a douche and was all rolling her eyes and looking pissed. Anyway, it ended up well.

It's Late. Zef Side!!!!

I put in a new blog header. I should have been spending this time working on my projects, but nay, I got sidetracked. I couldn't find many pictures of Philip, but then I found the one I'm using in the header, and couldn't let go of the fact that placing him upside turns him into the letter "y". Can you even tell? Kinda don't like when stuff like that happens 'cause even when I'm hating the look of it, I still can't let it go. Plug. Then I got all into using pictures as letters, and went through all my pictures to find one of me somewhat making a letter or shape; and the one in the header was as close as it got. It looks like I'm making the kissy face, which is lame and you know it too. Really though, I've noticed that is just a face I make a lot for pictures after I've had a few drinks. I going to have to remind myself to change that up quick. Help me.

Here's a video of a song (Zef Side) that I think I like. When I first saw this video, I got really weirded out, which you probably will too, but I couldn't stop playing it over and over again. I ended up spending a whole Saturday afternoon looking up all their other songs and bios and other videos and articles and pictures. I was in that obsessive, web-surfing zone and was probably hunched over my laptop looking all crazy. I was reminded of posting this 'cause Philip just referenced it the other day- but I don't remember why.

ZEF SIDEEEE!

postscript
I was dying to find a picture of myself reaching my arm out so that I could make a collage of my hand up in Philip's face. Muy Thai! Hiya! That would have made for a better banner.


post-postscript
Retired.


jess

Waiting.

I'm downtown waiting to process yet another wastewater application for a new project. I realized that all this waiting around is a waste of time, so I've decided to start writing the blogs while I wait. There are people sitting all around me, so I keep shrinking my font size down so that they can't read it. Gottem. I know they want to look hard, especially the people behind me.

This past weekend was super fun. (By the way, I hate when people mistakenly say "This passed weekend".)

On Friday, we went to Oishii for happy hour since Philip can't eat meat on Fridays. Lent. The chopped scallop and salmon sashimi went hard.<--- "went hard" is the modern-day vernacular for: super, good, awesome, best, A+, bonus. I was being rebellious and strayed from the happy hour menu, much to Philip's dismay. <----Written in the style of classical literature.

Later we went to Rudyard's to play darts and shoot pool. Wait, before that we went to Cecil's for one round of pool 'cause Rudyard's was too packed. Philip won that game; but whatever, 'cause those pool sticks were boo boo. Went back to Rudz and it was still packed with a bunch of people that usually aren't there. I know this because we run that place, since summer '09, baby. I love that place for real though. The bartenders are super cool to us and the drinks are cheap. One day I'm going to feel nostalgia-overload towards that place. Anyway, it was packed because they were having a memorial for the guy who designed all the metalwork for the bar. I guess he was a cool guy and pretty well known in the community since it was so packed. At one point there was a lot of cheering and crowding around going on when this one guy (I found out it was the local "crazy-man") came down the stairs on roller-skates while balancing a beer on his head. I like that kind of dumb stuff.

Wow. I have been waiting for 2 straight hours now. That means this post will be long and boring since I am just aimlessly typing, trying to keep myself busy.

Went to Dallas on Saturday morning for the Paqciauo fight. The whole trip went hard. I wonder if when you write stuff like this, are you supposed to go into detail so that you don't forget some of the good stuff? Or will just reading about the gist of it trigger the memories.

Oh, my turn. Bye.

Jess

Today is a Good Day

You know how there are some days when driving somewhere is the best thing in the world? Yeah, I love those days. I think the recipe for "good-day-driving" success is: perfect weather + driving fast + driver's side window down + a cd you've overplayed but is still in the cd player, and it's all of a sudden really jammable again + arm out the window + being alone.

Also, I think it should be legal to drive really fast if you're a good driver. We (yes, we. 'cause I'm one of them and if you agree with this, that means you're probably a good driver too) should get a special license so when we get pulled over, the cop is like, "Oh, you're part of the G.D. program."

When I left my place this morning, there were some contractors cleaning my neighbor's brick wall. I was holding my laptop and one of the contractors (Luis) asked me if what I was holding was a laptop. I said yes. He asked me if I had any for sale. I said yes, because I remembered that I had an old laptop at work that no one was using. I told him it would be slow because it's old and that it was heavy like a brick. He just wanted it to play dvds, he said. Anyway, I tested the laptop and it doesn't work. Sorry! (boring.)

I just returned a call to a client named Andy. I dialed the wrong number, but the guy happened to be an Andy as well, and he happened to know a Jessica. It was confusing for like 30 seconds. Then we talked about how coincidental that was. But not really, cause there are a million Andys and Jessicas in the world. Do you know one? I bet you do.

Also, why is it that the wrong numbers that call you are 95% Mexican? Or maybe they're not Mexican, but they like to speak Spanish.

jess

Bills, bills, bills

So... I woke up this morning to my alarm beeping. It's a fancy alarm because it has two alarm functions: music first, then beeping later- but also because it has a backup battery option so that it goes off even if it's unplugged, except when that happens, no music. First clue.

Then I go to my bathroom and flip the light switch which doesn't work. Second clue.
My first instinct is to go to the backyard and mess with the electricity box (whatever it's called) because my place is old and the power always goes out. But usually when that happens certain areas in my house aren't affected. So I try the kitchen switch.

Fine. I didn't pay my dang electricity bill. I thought I paid, but you can't trust automated phone payments because they're run by robots. Which, if you think about it, should probably be more competent than real people.

I'm going to be optimistic though. Here's why: My first class got canceled today, meaning I got up at 10am instead of at 7am. I found out the power company came to cut me off at 8am. If I had regular class, I wouldn't have found out about this ROBBERY until I got home at 5. That would mean I would have had to suffer a depressing, dark night until they came the next day. Also, the weather was perfect today. If this was any other day, my space heater would have shut off and I would have been dead meat. AND, the sun was super bright today so I could still do my makeup pretty well in my room. Whew. (I feel like the word "day" is too overpowering in this paragraph.)

Let's hope the power company hooks me up before I get home.

I met my new neighbors yesterday. Philip called to tell me that he heard them in the backyard, so he stood in the bedroom and spied on them through the cracks in the blind. He said he made eye contact with the guy and that's funny. I bet he got super scared and started doing things like moving stuff around, touching stuff -how I do when I get flustered.

I wanted to meet them really badly but Philip was against it because, you know, he freaking just spied on them and got "caught". I obliged him, but then when I was taking out the trash I ran into them anyway. I bet my subconscious told me to do that. I greeted them and we did the whole handshake thing. I said, "Hi, nice to meet you. I'm Jessica." He said, "Hi, nice to meet you. I'm Adam." I said, "Nice to meet you Madame." OH MY GOD. SO EMBARRASSING. I thought about it all day and even before I went to sleep.